I have read some posts on here where individuals believe it is rude to request money for a funeral. I did not learn of the practice of giving the gift of money until my grandmother had passed away, and I cannot tell you how much the funds assisted with paying for everything involved to properly lay her to rest; as she did not have insurance.
My question is, how do I politiely and properly request individuals give money? I have a friend who just lost her son on Christmas Day. He was sick for many years (and un-insurable), they do not have much money and are talking about taking out a home equity loan to try and pay for a proper funeral. They do have two other children to think of as well and I%26#039;d like to do whatever I can to ensure those who wish to pay their respects do so with a donation to the family instead of flowers. PLEASE HELP!
Request money instead of flowers for a funeral - need polite and proper wording?
Funerals and weddings are private family affairs. No family should feel obliged to host a grand occasion that they cannot afford. There are ways to cut costs for the funeral and burial (for example, cremation is much less expensive) which they should discuss with their pastor and with the funeral director.
Reply:I agree with deble. Say %26quot;...in lieu of flowers, memorials may be sent to:%26quot; If you say, %26quot;memorials%26quot; it sounds better than %26quot;monetary gifts%26quot; and people will still know what you%26#039;re talking about.
Reply:Just say something like...in lieu of flowers, memorials may be sent to: (set up a bank account somewhere to help pay the final costs...I see this in the paper in my area all the time...people will know what to do when they read that.)
Reply:Has the obit been published in the local paper yet? If not it could be mentioned in there that %26quot;it is suggested that monetary gifts be sent in lieu of flowers to the family%26quot; or some such. I%26#039;ve seen it done before. I don%26#039;t think it%26#039;s greedy, I%26#039;m sure when people find out the circumstances of the death and the family they will be happy to do what is best.
Reply:In lieu of flowers, the family requests memorials to xxxx, or xxxx.
Some people will feel uncomfortable giving money directly to the family, so have an alternative - perhaps a charity for what he had. A trust has to be set up for living people - so perhaps a trust for the other two children could be the alternative.
A local bank will usually be willing to set up a special account to receive money for funeral expenses. This should not be put in the obit. If there is going to be an article in the paper about him - that would be an appropriate place. You can also communicate their desires via phone if you speak to anyone directly.
Reply:Lately I have seen a lot more people asking for their lasting memories to be considered donated to the (person who passed) fund sent up at a bank.
This may seem tacky to those who did not know the deceased and their situation. Those who were close will understand.
I know I did not word the first part correctly, but I hope it helps.
I am also sorry for you and your friends loss- you are in my heart.
Reply:I really don%26#039;t think there is an appropriate way to ask for money. If they have family members then they should ask THEM. If you are handling it then you ask them. They should stick together. They are the ones who should chip in ... not friends and outside people. That%26#039;s just not appropriate to me.
Reply:Just tell the individuals about the situation, and I%26#039;m sure they would be more than happy to give money instead of flowers. I don%26#039;t think that it would be that hard to do so. Just tell them exactly what you said on here, and if they have any heart at all, they will understand.
Reply:They may %26quot;need it%26quot; but handing an envelope to with money to anyone can create an uncomfortable situation for both the giver and receiver.
I agree that wording such as %26quot;In lieu of flowers a monetary gift can be sent to XXX.%26quot; Not everyone will follow it, but it%26#039;s a possibility.
While I realize that they may be in a financial hardship you cannot hold out an expectation that everyone will want or be willing to donate - but those that do will most likely want to do it discretely and away from the prying eye of others at the funeral.
Reply:In lieu of flowers, the family request that donations be made to xxx.
I would hope that most people who attend the funeral would know about the family%26#039;s hardship with the cost of burial. Sometimes %26quot;word of mouth%26quot;, will help spread the word.
Also, if their is a 211 info line in your state, there are charitable organization that help with funeral expenses.
Also, you could try a bereavement envelope.
Good luck with helping them
Sorry for your loss
Reply:look i just buried my brother last month the casket alone was almost 8,000.00 he was tall and wide so i had to get a specially made casket. the cost to open the grave was 1400.00 . the church was 300.00 . the pallbearers were 50.00 a piece blah blah blah the entire funeral cost over 12,000.00 he also had no insurance, no wife no kids. if you need the money than ask the funeral director to post it in the newspaper, many times the mourners call the funeral parlor to ask about which florist to use.... say money.... pass the word to one good friend and tell them to spread the word. there is no time for embarassament or shame. it%26#039;s not a matter of doing above your means as some snob on here suggested .... everything costs money and to these vendors it is just a business, supply and demand. my sympathies to the mother who lost her child and applause to you for trying to help her. no matter how long the sickness was it is never easy to let them go.
Reply:I think this is not an unreasonable thing, but the etiquette issue comes into play if you approach it as an expectation that anyone will do anything (send flowers, donate, etc.) Of course, most WILL, but etiquette only requires personal expressions of sympathy. The flowers and other things are officially %26quot;unexpected%26quot; and understood to be given freely as an outpouring of comfort and respect for the deceased and the family. That said, the way to get out the word is to do it informally (that is, verbally and not in writing), and perhaps to let the people you call know that you will provide a basket at the back of the parlor, with cards, pen, and envelopes for those who wish to LEAVE AN EXPRESSION OF SYMPATHY AND SUPPORT (that is, help with funeral expenses.)
If YOU do it FOR the family, and approach it as an informal thing by putting the bug in everyone%26#039;s ear verbally beforehand, providing a convenient means, etc., then the family isn%26#039;t seen as begging, or looking to benefit from the death (some would suggest that).
Often I have seen a trust account set up for things like this, or to cover the cost of a suit to bury someone in one, who doesn%26#039;t have one. A trust account at a bank is a way to make sure the money doesn%26#039;t end up accidentally in someone%26#039;s pocket and used for something other than the intended purpose (sorry to make these kinds of statements, but it happens). Setting up a trust account for the funeral expenses is not hard to do, but it does require an attorney to sign off the paperwork. If you or someone else close to the family has an attorney who can do this, then you can just put the trust thing in the newspaper obit, or even on little cards at the visitation, again, either at the back of the parlor, or even by the guest book.
Hope this helps. I think in a situation like you%26#039;ve described, this is NOT inappropriate, and can be handled in a low-key, thoughtful way. In fact, where I come from, everyone who can afford to do so includes a $10 or a $20 in their sympathy card. We assume there are expenses the family will need help with, and that a death either results in not only expenses, but a loss of income or labor. I come from a low-income, rural area, where everyone who can offer a hand does so, when needed, and most of the time everyone knows the situation anyway.
Hope that helps.
make up
Saturday, April 11, 2009
Is it okay to carry flowers into a funeral home instead of delivering them?
My Aunt died and she will not have that many flowers at her funeral. I feel bad because I cannot afford the $50 - 150 that flowers cost from FTD florists. I was wondering if I could carry them in a bag and place them in the office when you first walk in. That way the funeral home would place them in the room where my aunt is. I am embarassed at the thought, however I cannot afford to send flowers. Am I better off going empty handed? Also to add, My aunt lives in a very low populated area and I dont think she will have many flowers. I would love to see a few sent flowers around her, especially for my cousin%26#039;s sake.
Is it okay to carry flowers into a funeral home instead of delivering them?
yes carrying them would be fine. who cares how they get there as long as it get there. Sorry about ur Aunt
Reply:I think that carrying flowers in will be fine. It%26#039;s the thought that counts, and you obviously care a lot.
Reply:Some people don%26#039;t want flowers at the funeral anymore. The flowers are left at the graveside and they just wither away and die.
As a rule you don%26#039;t bring flowers to a funeral. What you can do is bring a plant to your aunts home for her family. A plant will live forever...much longer than flowers at the funeral.
I%26#039;m sorry for your lose.
Reply:I have seen wealthy people that can afford to send flowers carry them in. Its not that big of a deal on how it gets there. Its the though of that its there.
You could take it early in the day to the funeral home when there are not a lot of people and give it to the office and then they could place as well.
A potted plant lasts alot longer than flowers. Or u can get a plant and flower mixture.
Reply:yes it is
Reply:don%26#039;t ever be ashamed of any gift that comes from the heart and soul. don%26#039;t go empty handed. this is something that you want to give to your aunt. never be ashamed of any gift -- big or small - just do it with love and it%26#039;s the biggest gift on the face of the earth to the person you are doing it for. people worry too much on what others think. you are not trying to please them. this is something you are to doing to give thanks to your aunt. my hat goes off to you. i think it%26#039;s beautiful. God Bless YOU!
Reply:that%26#039;s a wonderful idea. i just see one thing wrong with what you want to do.i don%26#039;t think you need to place them in the office.you can walk them up to her casket and place them at the closed end of it.i have done this in the past and see nothing wrong with it at all. and you don%26#039;t need to tell anyone it was because you could not afford to have them sent, if you are asked {and i doubt that you would be} just say that you wanted to do one last thing for her.one more thing, don%26#039;t bring them in a bag, carry them.PS. sorry about your aunt
Reply:yes absulutely usually people have flowers delivered when they dont attend
skin disease
Is it okay to carry flowers into a funeral home instead of delivering them?
yes carrying them would be fine. who cares how they get there as long as it get there. Sorry about ur Aunt
Reply:I think that carrying flowers in will be fine. It%26#039;s the thought that counts, and you obviously care a lot.
Reply:Some people don%26#039;t want flowers at the funeral anymore. The flowers are left at the graveside and they just wither away and die.
As a rule you don%26#039;t bring flowers to a funeral. What you can do is bring a plant to your aunts home for her family. A plant will live forever...much longer than flowers at the funeral.
I%26#039;m sorry for your lose.
Reply:I have seen wealthy people that can afford to send flowers carry them in. Its not that big of a deal on how it gets there. Its the though of that its there.
You could take it early in the day to the funeral home when there are not a lot of people and give it to the office and then they could place as well.
A potted plant lasts alot longer than flowers. Or u can get a plant and flower mixture.
Reply:yes it is
Reply:don%26#039;t ever be ashamed of any gift that comes from the heart and soul. don%26#039;t go empty handed. this is something that you want to give to your aunt. never be ashamed of any gift -- big or small - just do it with love and it%26#039;s the biggest gift on the face of the earth to the person you are doing it for. people worry too much on what others think. you are not trying to please them. this is something you are to doing to give thanks to your aunt. my hat goes off to you. i think it%26#039;s beautiful. God Bless YOU!
Reply:that%26#039;s a wonderful idea. i just see one thing wrong with what you want to do.i don%26#039;t think you need to place them in the office.you can walk them up to her casket and place them at the closed end of it.i have done this in the past and see nothing wrong with it at all. and you don%26#039;t need to tell anyone it was because you could not afford to have them sent, if you are asked {and i doubt that you would be} just say that you wanted to do one last thing for her.one more thing, don%26#039;t bring them in a bag, carry them.PS. sorry about your aunt
Reply:yes absulutely usually people have flowers delivered when they dont attend
skin disease
Do you buy flowers for a funeral?
one of my friends Matt died in a car crash last week and his funeral is on friday iv asked a friend for the number of the place doing the flowers but he never got back to me and i dont want to ask matts mum as shes got lots more on her mind, so now the funerals in 2 days and i dont know what to do, if i buy a bunch of flowers what ones should i get or should i just not take anything? i dont want to turn up trying to find somwhere to put the flowers? but dnt want to turn up with nothing and be insulting, i have been fortunate enough never to have had to gone to any other funerals so am unsure what to do?
Thanks
Do you buy flowers for a funeral?
I am so sorry for the loss of your friend Matt. I totally agree with BetsyB on this. She has some very good advise. I have just buried my second husband and one of the nicest things (concerning flowers) that anyone did for me was to plant a tree in his honor. Maybe you could plant a tree at his mom%26#039;s house for her in Matt%26#039;s honor. Just be there for each other and talk about the good times you had with your friend. It will be good for you and Matt%26#039;s mom will be glad you were a good friend. Bless you, dear one.
Reply:For funerals, there is not %26quot;A florist%26quot; that does the flowers. Everyone just calls the florist they want. Sometimes there can be 3-5 different florist represented. Just call a florist in the area and don%26#039;t bother anyone with the specifics.
Reply:dont worry about flowers. your presence is enough.
Reply:TELL A FLORIST THE SITUTATION THEY WILL KNOW ....FLOWERS CAN BE A BLESSING.
Reply:Everytime I%26#039;ve ever ordered flowers for a funeral, I just go to a florist, tell them how much I want to spend %26amp; where to take them. They will do the rest. They will let you sign a card or they will sign your name for you. It%26#039;s pretty simple. If the family of the deceased has requested that donations be made to a cause in lieu of flowers, then do that. If that is what they wish, then find out what %26quot;cause%26quot;, contact them (the organization) and give them whatever donation you wish %26amp; request that they let the family know that you did this in lieu of flowers.
Sorry about your friend...hang in there.
Reply:My funeral director has been instructed to put in my death notice that in lieu of flowers, please donate to my favorite animal charity.
Reply:If you have the money, you could call a florist and have them deliver some flowers, if not send a note to the family recalling some good times you shared with Matt.
Reply:When you find out where the funeral is, as the funeral home where the nearest florist is. The florist usually has arrangements already made. They can send something over immediately. A lot of people contact the funeral home to find a florist. When the florist delivers, the funeral director will find a place to put them. When my Grandfather died, the wake was for 2 days. Flowers kept coming and coming in from the local florist. It was quite nice.
Reply:I don%26#039;t buy flowers because with that money for something that dies, I can make a lasting gift of a donation. Buy a sympathy card. Write a note to his parents on the white left hand side about the best things you liked doing with Matt and you together. Then write a check, or go to Western Union or a bank or Amscott or your parents and have a check for $25 written. If the obit didn%26#039;t say, %26quot; Donations to Name Charity may be made in his name, or Donations to a charity of one%26#039;s choice may be made in Matt%26#039;s name, then tell them that you are making this donation in Matt%26#039;s name to .....the Athletic/Art/Whatever Department at your school. You get the idea? Sorry for your loss. Makes better drivers of young people, doesn%26#039;t it? Many of us have been through it.
Reply:I agree about your presence being enough. I never send flowers anymore. They don%26#039;t last, and most people don%26#039;t know what to do with all that they get. Now, I send a nice green plant---not a flowering one, because they don%26#039;t last either.
Or I give money in a card. But best of all would be a letter to his mom. And you can send that even after the funeral. When my son died, the mom of one of his friends wrote me the nicest letter telling me of the times my son was at her house and what she remembered of him. And a friend of his handed me a letter he had written about the fun times they had together. I remember those things more than who gave what flowers.
I%26#039;m sorry for your loss of a friend.
Reply:Call the funeral home sometimes they want you to make a donation to a organization or church. The funeral home should know this information.
Reply:the way it seems to be done, is you find out the funeral home/church where ever funeral/family night is going to be held send flowers. they are usually all in one big room with the casket. then when they take the body to the graveyard they usually have a flower car that takes all the flowers the family bought or have been sent by other. that is how it happen every time i have been to a funeral.
Reply:If this was a good friend, then you should be focusing on your own mourning and not fussing over etiquette. There is plenty of time to express your condolences in flowers or some other format later: right now, your simple presence at the funeral will be the most healing thing for you and for his family.
If you really feel the need to provide flowers, contact a florist yourself and have them deliver the package. Do not show up at the funeral home or church with a bouquet in hand.
I think, though, that Matt%26#039;s family will have recieved enough flowers. Prepare a letter to him saying your goodbyes and how much you loved him and place it in his casket (if you can); otherwise, give it to his mother or another relative to be buried with him or to be read by his parents at a later date. This will be a gift to him, to his family, and to yourself.
Reply:Of course, it%26#039;s a very caring gesture to bring flowers as it represents symbolically, the vibrant life of the deceased and it comforts the family to see visible signs of sympathy. You would place your flowers near the casket or around the alter of the church. Even a simple wildflower bouquet in a plain vase is acceptable. It depends on what you can afford, but anything is better than nothing!
Reply:You have a few options.
1. Don%26#039;t send anything. Just show up. Matt%26#039;s mum will be very happy to see you.
2. Send flowers to the funeral home with a note. You can do this through a florist. You don%26#039;t need to bring them with you. In fact, it is probably better that the florist deliver them. The funeral director knows what to do with the flowers once they arrive.
3. You can send a card to Matt%26#039;s mum with a check for a sum you think is appropriate. She can use the check for whatever she wants. I did this many years ago when an uncle passed away. My aunt used the money to put it towards his headstone.
4. You can send a check with a sum you can afford to one of many charities in Matt%26#039;s name. The charity will ask you for Matt%26#039;s mum%26#039;s address. She will receive notification that you donated money in Matt%26#039;s name.
I hope these suggestions help you.
I am very sorry for your loss.
Reply:♥ ♥ sorry about your friend... you can just call any florist they will help you decide what to send and they will send it to the mortuary for you... so dont worry... remember too that they will probably get flowers so maybe instead go to a nursery or store and buy a nice small house plant and include a gift of money in a nice card... there are alot of expenses in a funeral and most people are not prepared for that...♥ ♥
Reply:for the view nah but for the buriel yeah you should
computer
Thanks
Do you buy flowers for a funeral?
I am so sorry for the loss of your friend Matt. I totally agree with BetsyB on this. She has some very good advise. I have just buried my second husband and one of the nicest things (concerning flowers) that anyone did for me was to plant a tree in his honor. Maybe you could plant a tree at his mom%26#039;s house for her in Matt%26#039;s honor. Just be there for each other and talk about the good times you had with your friend. It will be good for you and Matt%26#039;s mom will be glad you were a good friend. Bless you, dear one.
Reply:For funerals, there is not %26quot;A florist%26quot; that does the flowers. Everyone just calls the florist they want. Sometimes there can be 3-5 different florist represented. Just call a florist in the area and don%26#039;t bother anyone with the specifics.
Reply:dont worry about flowers. your presence is enough.
Reply:TELL A FLORIST THE SITUTATION THEY WILL KNOW ....FLOWERS CAN BE A BLESSING.
Reply:Everytime I%26#039;ve ever ordered flowers for a funeral, I just go to a florist, tell them how much I want to spend %26amp; where to take them. They will do the rest. They will let you sign a card or they will sign your name for you. It%26#039;s pretty simple. If the family of the deceased has requested that donations be made to a cause in lieu of flowers, then do that. If that is what they wish, then find out what %26quot;cause%26quot;, contact them (the organization) and give them whatever donation you wish %26amp; request that they let the family know that you did this in lieu of flowers.
Sorry about your friend...hang in there.
Reply:My funeral director has been instructed to put in my death notice that in lieu of flowers, please donate to my favorite animal charity.
Reply:If you have the money, you could call a florist and have them deliver some flowers, if not send a note to the family recalling some good times you shared with Matt.
Reply:When you find out where the funeral is, as the funeral home where the nearest florist is. The florist usually has arrangements already made. They can send something over immediately. A lot of people contact the funeral home to find a florist. When the florist delivers, the funeral director will find a place to put them. When my Grandfather died, the wake was for 2 days. Flowers kept coming and coming in from the local florist. It was quite nice.
Reply:I don%26#039;t buy flowers because with that money for something that dies, I can make a lasting gift of a donation. Buy a sympathy card. Write a note to his parents on the white left hand side about the best things you liked doing with Matt and you together. Then write a check, or go to Western Union or a bank or Amscott or your parents and have a check for $25 written. If the obit didn%26#039;t say, %26quot; Donations to Name Charity may be made in his name, or Donations to a charity of one%26#039;s choice may be made in Matt%26#039;s name, then tell them that you are making this donation in Matt%26#039;s name to .....the Athletic/Art/Whatever Department at your school. You get the idea? Sorry for your loss. Makes better drivers of young people, doesn%26#039;t it? Many of us have been through it.
Reply:I agree about your presence being enough. I never send flowers anymore. They don%26#039;t last, and most people don%26#039;t know what to do with all that they get. Now, I send a nice green plant---not a flowering one, because they don%26#039;t last either.
Or I give money in a card. But best of all would be a letter to his mom. And you can send that even after the funeral. When my son died, the mom of one of his friends wrote me the nicest letter telling me of the times my son was at her house and what she remembered of him. And a friend of his handed me a letter he had written about the fun times they had together. I remember those things more than who gave what flowers.
I%26#039;m sorry for your loss of a friend.
Reply:Call the funeral home sometimes they want you to make a donation to a organization or church. The funeral home should know this information.
Reply:the way it seems to be done, is you find out the funeral home/church where ever funeral/family night is going to be held send flowers. they are usually all in one big room with the casket. then when they take the body to the graveyard they usually have a flower car that takes all the flowers the family bought or have been sent by other. that is how it happen every time i have been to a funeral.
Reply:If this was a good friend, then you should be focusing on your own mourning and not fussing over etiquette. There is plenty of time to express your condolences in flowers or some other format later: right now, your simple presence at the funeral will be the most healing thing for you and for his family.
If you really feel the need to provide flowers, contact a florist yourself and have them deliver the package. Do not show up at the funeral home or church with a bouquet in hand.
I think, though, that Matt%26#039;s family will have recieved enough flowers. Prepare a letter to him saying your goodbyes and how much you loved him and place it in his casket (if you can); otherwise, give it to his mother or another relative to be buried with him or to be read by his parents at a later date. This will be a gift to him, to his family, and to yourself.
Reply:Of course, it%26#039;s a very caring gesture to bring flowers as it represents symbolically, the vibrant life of the deceased and it comforts the family to see visible signs of sympathy. You would place your flowers near the casket or around the alter of the church. Even a simple wildflower bouquet in a plain vase is acceptable. It depends on what you can afford, but anything is better than nothing!
Reply:You have a few options.
1. Don%26#039;t send anything. Just show up. Matt%26#039;s mum will be very happy to see you.
2. Send flowers to the funeral home with a note. You can do this through a florist. You don%26#039;t need to bring them with you. In fact, it is probably better that the florist deliver them. The funeral director knows what to do with the flowers once they arrive.
3. You can send a card to Matt%26#039;s mum with a check for a sum you think is appropriate. She can use the check for whatever she wants. I did this many years ago when an uncle passed away. My aunt used the money to put it towards his headstone.
4. You can send a check with a sum you can afford to one of many charities in Matt%26#039;s name. The charity will ask you for Matt%26#039;s mum%26#039;s address. She will receive notification that you donated money in Matt%26#039;s name.
I hope these suggestions help you.
I am very sorry for your loss.
Reply:♥ ♥ sorry about your friend... you can just call any florist they will help you decide what to send and they will send it to the mortuary for you... so dont worry... remember too that they will probably get flowers so maybe instead go to a nursery or store and buy a nice small house plant and include a gift of money in a nice card... there are alot of expenses in a funeral and most people are not prepared for that...♥ ♥
Reply:for the view nah but for the buriel yeah you should
computer
Can I bring flowers to a funeral, or do they have to be sent ahead of time?
I am attending a funeral of a neighbor who passed away recently. The funeral is in a very small coastal town, and there are no local florists. It would be very expensive to have them sent. In the obituary it says %26quot;friends and family may bring flowers or, flowers can be sent to%26quot;...(home address of the brother). Do you think that means bring them to the brother%26#039;s home, or bring them with you to the funeral? If I hand deliver them to the brother%26#039;s home, should I do so the evening before the funeral? If i bring them to to funeral, should I show up early so that they can be placed near the casket?
Can I bring flowers to a funeral, or do they have to be sent ahead of time?
When my grandmother passed away some people sent flowers to the funeral home and some people brought them with them then on the day of the funeral all of the flowers were put into the hearse the ones that were in vases the director gave to my parents to take home. I wouldn%26#039;t take flowers over to there house the night before because they probably are going to have alot of things to do and it is a very emotional time when there is a death in the family.Also depending on the size of family might have a lot of family over.
Reply:Usually this means to have the flowers delivered by the florist in which you are using to make the arrangement. Otherwise, I would either call the person it states to send them to and ask what should be done. If all else fails, bring them to the brothers house before the funeral...usually the flowers are set next to and around the casket at the wake and/or funeral so youd want them to be there before either of those you were getting them for.
Reply:Not sure why this is in law and ethics instead of etiquette. Legally anyone of the options you offered would be LEGAL. And I suspect from and etiquette standpoint any one would be ok too.
White Teeth
Can I bring flowers to a funeral, or do they have to be sent ahead of time?
When my grandmother passed away some people sent flowers to the funeral home and some people brought them with them then on the day of the funeral all of the flowers were put into the hearse the ones that were in vases the director gave to my parents to take home. I wouldn%26#039;t take flowers over to there house the night before because they probably are going to have alot of things to do and it is a very emotional time when there is a death in the family.Also depending on the size of family might have a lot of family over.
Reply:Usually this means to have the flowers delivered by the florist in which you are using to make the arrangement. Otherwise, I would either call the person it states to send them to and ask what should be done. If all else fails, bring them to the brothers house before the funeral...usually the flowers are set next to and around the casket at the wake and/or funeral so youd want them to be there before either of those you were getting them for.
Reply:Not sure why this is in law and ethics instead of etiquette. Legally anyone of the options you offered would be LEGAL. And I suspect from and etiquette standpoint any one would be ok too.
White Teeth
Can you carry flowers into a funeral home?
My Aunt died and she will not have that many flowers at her funeral. I feel bad because I cannot afford the $50 - 150 that flowers cost from FTD florists. I was wondering if I could carry them in a bag and place them in the office when you first walk in. That way the funeral home would place them in the room where my aunt is.
I am embarassed at the thought, however I cannot afford to send flowers. Am I better off going empty handed?
Also to add, My aunt lives in a very low populated area and I dont think she will have many flowers. I would love to see a few sent flowers around her, especially for my cousin%26#039;s sake.
Can you carry flowers into a funeral home?
you can place them in a vase, and yes take them in with you, or else hand them to the funeral personnel,, you also could take them by ahead of time, then they could place them
Reply:i hope you brought the flowers..... your aunt would have loved to see you walking in with flowes i%26#039;m a florist and i always tell my customers you buy the flowers to honor the person not to impress the family Report It
Reply:I%26#039;m so sorry to hear about your aunt. Well you could find a nice basket or container, pick some nice flowers, and put them in it. You could find a nice ribbon and find a way to attach a nice card to it. Or you could make a framed collage of some pictures of her. They did something like that at my cousin%26#039;s funeral a couple years ago. Well take care.
Reply:My condolences to u n ur family. I lost an aunt just recently too. Yes, u can take flowers in urself n put them where u want them or ask the staff to do it for u. I hv done this n hv seen other do it too. Don%26#039;t b embarrassed, no one knows its cuz u can%26#039;t afford it, they will think u picked them up from a florist u prefer.
Reply:galbee Your story? Very interesting......
★※★http://www.osoq.com/funstuff/extra/extra...
Reply:Of course you can. There are no hard and fast rules about things like that. And if there ARE such rules, thumb your nose at them and take them anyway. If anyone objects or complains tell them they can kiss you rosy butt on main street.
Reply:If you can, take them early. Give them to one of the personnel. When my son died, the funeral director said someone had brought out a plant earlier. So it is perfectly fine to take them yourself.
I%26#039;m sorry to hear about your aunt.
Reply:Sure, why not.
Reply:Yes-it really is the thought that counts. Just don%26#039;t hand them to the mourners-find the funeral director and ask him/her to find a suitable place for them.
I%26#039;m sorry for your loss!
Reply:yes you can bring flowers it is not uncommon
Reply:Call the funeral home and just explain to them the situation. I%26#039;m sure it%26#039;ll be fine, just then tell them that you%26#039;ll carry the flowers to them ASAP. Funeral homes understand alot of this stuff, so.
Reply:sure why not, it%26#039;s better than nothing, right?
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I am embarassed at the thought, however I cannot afford to send flowers. Am I better off going empty handed?
Also to add, My aunt lives in a very low populated area and I dont think she will have many flowers. I would love to see a few sent flowers around her, especially for my cousin%26#039;s sake.
Can you carry flowers into a funeral home?
you can place them in a vase, and yes take them in with you, or else hand them to the funeral personnel,, you also could take them by ahead of time, then they could place them
Reply:i hope you brought the flowers..... your aunt would have loved to see you walking in with flowes i%26#039;m a florist and i always tell my customers you buy the flowers to honor the person not to impress the family Report It
Reply:I%26#039;m so sorry to hear about your aunt. Well you could find a nice basket or container, pick some nice flowers, and put them in it. You could find a nice ribbon and find a way to attach a nice card to it. Or you could make a framed collage of some pictures of her. They did something like that at my cousin%26#039;s funeral a couple years ago. Well take care.
Reply:My condolences to u n ur family. I lost an aunt just recently too. Yes, u can take flowers in urself n put them where u want them or ask the staff to do it for u. I hv done this n hv seen other do it too. Don%26#039;t b embarrassed, no one knows its cuz u can%26#039;t afford it, they will think u picked them up from a florist u prefer.
Reply:galbee Your story? Very interesting......
★※★http://www.osoq.com/funstuff/extra/extra...
Reply:Of course you can. There are no hard and fast rules about things like that. And if there ARE such rules, thumb your nose at them and take them anyway. If anyone objects or complains tell them they can kiss you rosy butt on main street.
Reply:If you can, take them early. Give them to one of the personnel. When my son died, the funeral director said someone had brought out a plant earlier. So it is perfectly fine to take them yourself.
I%26#039;m sorry to hear about your aunt.
Reply:Sure, why not.
Reply:Yes-it really is the thought that counts. Just don%26#039;t hand them to the mourners-find the funeral director and ask him/her to find a suitable place for them.
I%26#039;m sorry for your loss!
Reply:yes you can bring flowers it is not uncommon
Reply:Call the funeral home and just explain to them the situation. I%26#039;m sure it%26#039;ll be fine, just then tell them that you%26#039;ll carry the flowers to them ASAP. Funeral homes understand alot of this stuff, so.
Reply:sure why not, it%26#039;s better than nothing, right?
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Babies funeral question about flowers?
my cousin just had a still born really hard tym she is only 18 so its hard to deal wit arrangin a funeral
ive told her ill help out n get the flowers for the funeral n get afew single loose roses or sumthin too just wanted to kno wat flowers r best for a babies funeral if u could tell me that would be great
Babies funeral question about flowers?
Talk to a local florist. They can suggest things to you.
Personally, on funeral arrangements or flowers for a child, I usually suggest a mixture of white, peach and light pink tea roses or some call them baby roses. That%26#039;s if it%26#039;s within spending range. Carnations add a nice touch, and are less expensive (almost 2-3 dollars cheaper per carnation stem compared to a single rose). You can also get miniatures in those. Usually, with a child%26#039;s funeral, we use the mini flowers.
I am soo deeply sorry for the loss.
Reply:sorry for the loss. I only know that Carnations are considered a funeral flower. Hope that helped a little bit.
Reply:I would suggest roses. They%26#039;re pretty traditional and come in a number of colors. I would suggest white or yellow for a baby boy and pink or lavender for a baby girl.
Reply:why is this is singles and dating?
Reply:If you can afford it, white roses and babies breath can signify returning the pure love of a child to God. Pink roses white carnations and babies breath can make a nice spray arrangement on the casket for a baby girl and for a boy something similar in blue. Some people like a stuffed animal in the arrangement and the parents are given this as a keepsake. A good florist in your town should be able to help you. I am so sorry for your loss.
Soles
ive told her ill help out n get the flowers for the funeral n get afew single loose roses or sumthin too just wanted to kno wat flowers r best for a babies funeral if u could tell me that would be great
Babies funeral question about flowers?
Talk to a local florist. They can suggest things to you.
Personally, on funeral arrangements or flowers for a child, I usually suggest a mixture of white, peach and light pink tea roses or some call them baby roses. That%26#039;s if it%26#039;s within spending range. Carnations add a nice touch, and are less expensive (almost 2-3 dollars cheaper per carnation stem compared to a single rose). You can also get miniatures in those. Usually, with a child%26#039;s funeral, we use the mini flowers.
I am soo deeply sorry for the loss.
Reply:sorry for the loss. I only know that Carnations are considered a funeral flower. Hope that helped a little bit.
Reply:I would suggest roses. They%26#039;re pretty traditional and come in a number of colors. I would suggest white or yellow for a baby boy and pink or lavender for a baby girl.
Reply:why is this is singles and dating?
Reply:If you can afford it, white roses and babies breath can signify returning the pure love of a child to God. Pink roses white carnations and babies breath can make a nice spray arrangement on the casket for a baby girl and for a boy something similar in blue. Some people like a stuffed animal in the arrangement and the parents are given this as a keepsake. A good florist in your town should be able to help you. I am so sorry for your loss.
Soles
Flowers for a babies funeral?
my cousin just had a still born really hard tym she is only 18 so its hard to deal wit arrangin a funeral
ive told her ill help out n get the flowers for the funeral n get afew single loose roses or sumthin too just wanted to kno wat flowers r best for a babies funeral if u could tell me that would be great
Flowers for a babies funeral?
White flowers are the sign of purity. And, a newborn is the epitomy of that. Otherwise, ask the mother what flowers she would have in mind for her baby. This is so heartbreaking - and you are a wonderful support in your cousin%26#039;s life. What a wonderful thing you are doing! Have a healthy and happy leap year!
Reply:when my son pased the flower shop did it for me. call them
Reply:The most extreme situation I have ever been acquainted with is when I was running a non profit organization that fed the poor and more.
A man and his son came in and wanted to donate to our Christmas give away but first they wanted me to know about the circumstances. I will try to relay what they told me.
The younger man had a daughter. She died very young. They asked that no one bring flowers but send toys to the funeral. After the services the father and grandfather came directly to me with a truckload of stuffed stuff from the proceedings. I was in tears because, it was amazing that they would even have the mental capacity to think like this in the middle of their grieving. With their story, I was whole heartily dedicated to getting these donations to kids that really needed help to find the meaning of Christmas. I told some of the parents about the hows and where fores so that they could give the presents their due respect..
This donation effected me and many others in ways that could not be priced. Encouraging others through this story is only the tip of the benefits..
life can be short. Let%26#039;s make the most of it.
Reply:Sorry for the loss. I only know that carnations are considered a funeral flower. Hope that helped a little bit.
Reply:it depends on how much money you have. All flowers are appropriate except for red roses. If you have a wholesale floral market near you, just go in and check out the prices. If you don%26#039;t, go into a florist and ask what kind of a deal they can give you and for what.
It isn%26#039;t summer, so cost is going to be high. Daffodils are coming in, and they%26#039;re a sign of spring and rebirth. If she has a church service, it would be a nice flower. Lilies too, but armloads of lilies are going to put a crimp in your budget.
you don%26#039;t want to add to the stress by overdoing on the flowers and putting yourself in debt.
I agree with the other person, a grave blanket (of flowers) is nice.
Reply:Baby%26#039;s Breath, Lilies of the Valley, White Roses and white Carnation%26#039;s would all be appropriate. Your local florist would be able to make suggestions, too.
Such a sad time for all of you, I hope you are very understanding of her emotional mood swings and keep a close watch on her during this difficult time.
Reply:ask your cousin what she would like. the funeral director could also handle everything for you. or you could ask him/her what is appropriate. a nice blanket of flowers that covers the casket would be very nice.
Reply:I would go to a floweriest and ask them what they normal sell to funerals. Explain the situation and go with what they say. I think it will make it easier for the family if they don%26#039;t have to worry about another thing for the funeral. I am sorry about your lose.
Reply:lillys
www.poetry.com
ive told her ill help out n get the flowers for the funeral n get afew single loose roses or sumthin too just wanted to kno wat flowers r best for a babies funeral if u could tell me that would be great
Flowers for a babies funeral?
White flowers are the sign of purity. And, a newborn is the epitomy of that. Otherwise, ask the mother what flowers she would have in mind for her baby. This is so heartbreaking - and you are a wonderful support in your cousin%26#039;s life. What a wonderful thing you are doing! Have a healthy and happy leap year!
Reply:when my son pased the flower shop did it for me. call them
Reply:The most extreme situation I have ever been acquainted with is when I was running a non profit organization that fed the poor and more.
A man and his son came in and wanted to donate to our Christmas give away but first they wanted me to know about the circumstances. I will try to relay what they told me.
The younger man had a daughter. She died very young. They asked that no one bring flowers but send toys to the funeral. After the services the father and grandfather came directly to me with a truckload of stuffed stuff from the proceedings. I was in tears because, it was amazing that they would even have the mental capacity to think like this in the middle of their grieving. With their story, I was whole heartily dedicated to getting these donations to kids that really needed help to find the meaning of Christmas. I told some of the parents about the hows and where fores so that they could give the presents their due respect..
This donation effected me and many others in ways that could not be priced. Encouraging others through this story is only the tip of the benefits..
life can be short. Let%26#039;s make the most of it.
Reply:Sorry for the loss. I only know that carnations are considered a funeral flower. Hope that helped a little bit.
Reply:it depends on how much money you have. All flowers are appropriate except for red roses. If you have a wholesale floral market near you, just go in and check out the prices. If you don%26#039;t, go into a florist and ask what kind of a deal they can give you and for what.
It isn%26#039;t summer, so cost is going to be high. Daffodils are coming in, and they%26#039;re a sign of spring and rebirth. If she has a church service, it would be a nice flower. Lilies too, but armloads of lilies are going to put a crimp in your budget.
you don%26#039;t want to add to the stress by overdoing on the flowers and putting yourself in debt.
I agree with the other person, a grave blanket (of flowers) is nice.
Reply:Baby%26#039;s Breath, Lilies of the Valley, White Roses and white Carnation%26#039;s would all be appropriate. Your local florist would be able to make suggestions, too.
Such a sad time for all of you, I hope you are very understanding of her emotional mood swings and keep a close watch on her during this difficult time.
Reply:ask your cousin what she would like. the funeral director could also handle everything for you. or you could ask him/her what is appropriate. a nice blanket of flowers that covers the casket would be very nice.
Reply:I would go to a floweriest and ask them what they normal sell to funerals. Explain the situation and go with what they say. I think it will make it easier for the family if they don%26#039;t have to worry about another thing for the funeral. I am sorry about your lose.
Reply:lillys
www.poetry.com
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